GARFIELD E. FRANCIS
The following poem has a lot more to it than people might think. Let me explain how I came to write this.
I was just sitting by my window and thinking about the way I was feeling. And what brought me to this moment in my life. Then I started thinking of everything I have put myself through since my wife was killed on me, back in 1991. And how I walked in and found her on the floor at 5 in the morning, and how guilty I was feeling for not being there to save her. Ever since, I lost my sense of worth. I did not care what I had; I just wanted to get through this life so I can be with her. I had wanted it to be me instead of her.
She was and still is the most wonderful person I have ever met. I was only 14 when we met and it took me six weeks to even kiss her on the cheek. She was so special to me. Then, back in 1989, we got mixed up with the drugs and because of that she was killed on me, and I lost all my will to go on. I just stayed in my own world, waiting, hiding, fighting, and just getting by. I lived with self pity as I waited to some day be with her.
I lost myself as well as her that day. I no longer had direction or hope in my life. After all these years, I am now learning other ways to deal with my loss. I do now know that no matter how hard I try to rush things in life, I will not get there any sooner or get done any faster, so I am going to try to get through life the best way I can without drugs and booze. But I will always have my hand out waiting for the day she can help me up and take me away to the Paradise where she now lives. She was and still is my angel in the sky. I gave her my love; she gave me her life.